Adventures in Adulting: Taking Little Steps to Change

Change is continuous. It is consuming. It happens perpetually, whether you want it to or not.
I tend to embrace change because it means progress and different horizons to pursue.

To me, change is another adventure.
This past year and a half has been full of change and full of adventures.  From the big changes, moving in with my then boyfriend, getting engaged starting a new job and then getting married...  Let's say, it's been a crazy whirlwind. I feel like I haven't stopped moving in a very long time.

I can say that I've embraced those big changes.  I've enjoyed those changes.  I've always adapted to the big changes.  After the first year living in Italy, it became second nature to blend to my surroundings and circumstance...
I guess it's easy to make the big changes.  You either roll with the punches or you get punched...
Surprisingly, of all the big changes this year, getting married has had the lightest impact...  The difference from  getting engaged, to being married has been small. The biggest change was actually the move in together. It's more difficult to create a household.  You have to adapt to each other's habits, both good and bad. For example, Baros has to put up with me leaving my clothes all over the place, forgetting to clean, not doing the dishes promptly etc.  I have to throw away his watermelon rinds. My habits are far more obnoxious.
My new job also changed our lives pretty drastically.  My schedule went from being a crazy split where I was working from 8am to 1pm and then again from 6pm to 10pm to a typical 9 to 5 job.  Now I can have a social life even if I do have a crazier commute.  Before I could walk to and from work in 20 minutes.  Now I take the bus, to the light rail, to the train.  It's an hour and 20 minutes in which I either fall asleep. I was a teacher before so now that I'm not, I don't have homework coming home with me, no grades after midnight, no lesson planning.  Overall, we can socialize with friends more and sleep on a more regular schedule.


I'm not sure why I struggle with small changes.  Inherently, small changes feel like they should be easier.  They're small, not life changing in big ways and yet I struggle with them regularly.
I struggle to change my tidiness habits (I'm definitely not as neat as I should be and I don't seem to actively notice when dust or grime collect).  It's hard to control my belongings and ultimately my space as a result.  That's ultimately why I went on my my clothes purge and desk toss last weekend.  I needed to get the stuff under control in a big way.  But wouldn't it be easier to do it a little at a time?  I guess?
I think this weekend more cleaning/purging shall be happening too (stay tuned for more updates here!)

And more recently than not, I'm finding it hard to manage my food and exercise habits.  Each habit is something small individually, but altogether they seem to pile up.  And as a result I've gained quite a bit of weight.

Two years ago, I went to the gym 4-5 times a week. Until I rehurt my knee, and subsequently started to experience tendinitis in my ankle I really enjoyed working out.  I love lifting weights and challenging myself to be better.  I hate cardio but it was always a necessary evil. I think my eating habits were roughly the same but I know I paid more attention to what I was consuming.

Gym selfie about a year and a half ago

about 6 months ago: one of my last gym sessions

Even though my body has healed (for the most part), with the change of job and apartment, getting back onto a regular gym schedule has not happened.  I'm tired and can't seem to make myself go. One little step.  I pay for the gym but I can't get there.  Actually, I should say, I'm too lazy to walk there.

So I know I should address the eating aspect of life because I can definitely control what goes into my body,  but I find it difficult to plan.  It feels overwhelming to "diet" in a healthy way without becoming obsessive.  And yet, in my attempt not to obsess, I've gained weight and unhealthy habits.

So much so that I now need to squeeze into a dress for September.  Sooo bring on the forced diet.

That's okay because I know I have to make some changes.  I have to treat myself and my surroundings better but I'm overwhelmed with these changes.  Individually small, but overall I have a lot to do.

Adding exercise to my life should not be more daunting than moving in with a significant other.
Eating healthier and cutting back on junkfood should not feel like a monumental task.

So yesterday, I started exercising again.  My ankle is feeling a little better so I walked up the giant staircase down the cliff to the main road after taking the light rail.  After dinner (which was unhealthy but easy), we did a couple of blogilates workouts (yes, I made my husband participate).  I love blogilates but I haven't done it in so long that it was tiring and I feel sore today but I did a couple more blogilates videos tonight too.

I rejoined Sparkpeople today.  It's an online diet and fitness community that enables you to track your food and fitness while connecting with other people trying to accomplish the same goals.  I used to use it back in college and I had done well with it and lost weight then.  So I'm going to try it again.  It has a lot of cool features (some of which are new to me). I set myself a short term goal and I can use it to track what I'm eating and how much I'm exercising.  I'm not sure if I'll use their meal planning but it's there for ideas.

So I'm starting to take some small steps towards change... I'm accepting the challenge for real now.
I guess I'm writing this so I hold myself accountable.  Now everyone knows what's up.

Adventures in Adulting: Purging My Overflowing Closet

So this past weekend, I finally had enough of my crazy full closet and overflowing drawers.
It's been impossible to find anything to wear even though I have so much clothing.  I have a little more than half the closet, a full set of 5 drawers plus one drawer from my husband's side.  I have my go-tos and then there's everything else.

Every morning, in my haze, it is a challenge to find work appropriate clothes and for weekends it takes forever to find anything cute enough to go out in.
And then once something is out, it's impossible to find a home for it so things kept disappearing into the abyss.  There were clothes on the desk, the chair, the bed, the floor and where ever else you can imagine.
Living in a small apartment starts to feel claustrophobic with that much stuff and I don't know how my husband puts up with me.  I'm incredibly grateful that he does.

Last week, I found a blog, Reading My Tea Leaves, which inspired me to clean up and purge my closet. The author, her husband and their two babies live in a tiny NYC apartment and before the kids they lived in an even smaller NYC apartment.  Her level of organization and minimalism is inspiring.  I read through all of her blogs about living in a tiny apartment and about purging/shaping her wardrobe.

And I realized that it was something I had to do.

There are two of us in in a one bedroom apartment where the living room doubles as an office (for Baros) and a craft studio (mostly for me, but sometimes for Baros too).  Between the two of us, we have a lot of stuff.

But let me be honest, I have A LOT of useless stuff.  Even in my last apartment and when I was living at home, I had wayyy too much clothing but never anything to wear.  I had every craft imaginable and paper supplies for days but I usually feel cramped with no where to move.  And of all of the stuff, I use maybe half of it (and that's probably being generous).  Of the clothing, I don't even think I like most of it. 

So I'm creating a new resolution for myself.  Clean and organize, but more importantly downsize.  It's the new adventure of being an adult and actually living like one.

This past weekend was the first step.
I took everything out of my closet, emptied my drawers (with the exception of my sock/underwear drawer and my workout gear and my seasonal winter stuff... which will be dealt with separately later on) and I tried to make myself brutally honest.

All of my clothes on the bed

I was honest about how often I wear things/want to wear things, and about how everything looked on. And then I purged.

After reading a whole lot about purging clothing, I decided to follow a 4 pile system.

• Love it/Gotta keep it 
• Maybe: I might wear this/It has it's uses
• Destroyed:  No longer wearable, broken/worn out 
• Donation: Still perfectly good but I'm not using it- it doesn't fit right, I don't like it etc.  

My largest pile was the maybe.  My love it pile was okay. The donation pile pretty large.  My unwearable pile was minimal (most of my clothes are well maintained). 

In my initial burst of making the piles, I didn't try anything on.  I tried to think about the last time I'd worn it, if I liked it, when I could wear it, etc.  I tried the Japanese method that involves holding the item.  If it brings you happiness, you keep it.  If not, it goes out.  However, I quickly understood that it was more difficult than it seemed. 

The Start of my donation pile

I also realized that the maybe pile was too big and I wasn't sure about everything in the Love it pile. Therefore, I went through the piles again. 

This time I tried everything on.  Did it fit?  Did it fit well?  Did I feel good in it? I tried to be honest about if I would actually wear it.  Where would I wear it? Work appropriate? With What? If I got rid of it, would I actually miss it? Was it comfortable? Was it tight?  Would I have to do the wiggle and be annoyed by it all day? 

I bothered Baros for his opinion about a million times.  

For anything, I had an emotional attachment to, I tried to figure out why and if it was worth keeping for that reason alone (bridesmaids dresses and clothing my grandmother made me had to stay even though I won't wear them anytime soon). By the end of the day, my donation pile grew incredibly and I think at the end of the season when I go through things again, it will grow again.  

Most importantly, I have free hangers and my clothes seems to fit in the drawers (we'll see what happens when we do laundry).

My folded donations  

I can do more.  I can purge more stuff, I just need to be a little mean and a lot realistic.  There's no reason to own so much stuff that I don't use.  It's hard to get rid of the clothes that are too small for you and the clothes you bought for when you lost a few pounds.  It's hard to get rid of the clothes you bought on sale but never wore or the clothes from when you used to go dancing.  But realistically, we don't need all of those things. It sucks that we didn't use them enough and wasted money somewhere along the line.  

But No excuses.  Someone else can get use of those clothes through donation. 

I felt like it was a great first step to downsizing.  I still had some attachment issues and I definitely still have too many cardigans but I reduced my wardrobe considerably and when summer is over I can get rid of any of the stuff I didn't use from now until then.  

On Sunday, I took a second step and I also got rid of the desk in my room.  In theory, it was a crafting table.  In reality, it was a space to throw things and collect dust.  It had so many unorganized, forgotten things on it.  

Things were either put away where they belong, thrown away or put to the side for further debate (we ran out of time since my friend came to visit and I needed a shower).  The desk itself was disassembled.  We kept part of the wood as a transportable crafting table so we don't ruin the kitchen table or Baros' beautiful work desk with glue or sharp objects.  

It's hard to say goodbye to things even when we know we don't need them anymore. But being realistic is part of being an adult.   It'll feel better to live in a less cluttered space with the ability to find things more easily. 

So I've accepted the challenge and the adventure of decluttering our space.  

Bucket List Adventures: The Cyclone, Coney Island

Prospect Park Concerts

Last weekend, we went to Prospect Park to watch a concert. There was a trio from Mali playing traditional Malian music and a Quartet changing up some classics.  It was a great picnic with friends and the music was lovely. 

Picnic style

At the end of the night, we decided to subway to Coney Island and walk to our friends house via the boardwalk.  It was a lovely night made for walking.

The Boardwalk

We got off the subway right in front of the Cyclone, a roller coaster that I've never been on.  It's a classic and one of the oldest wooden coasters in the country.  It was built in 1927 and has been going strong since (with a few periods of renovation).  In 1988, it was declared a NYC landmark and in 1991 it was placed on the National Register of Historic Places.

I promptly told Baros that we should go on it next time we were in Brooklyn.

Our friend looked at me and said, "Go on it now. You never know when you'll be back."

It's true. You never know what is going to happen tomorrow or on any of the tomorrows to come.  I always forget that planning is not necessary.  Sometimes you just need to act!
And so after a moment of hesitation, we decided to complete another check off of our Bucket List.

Our photographic evidence!!!

We went on our first roller coaster together! 

I'm so glad our friend encouraged us to do it.  She didn't join because she'd already been on it once before and so she stayed with all of our picnic stuff.

If you've never been on the Cyclone, I can happily say that it was worth it.  It's $10 a person so they can maintain this historical wooden coaster. 

It was faster than I thought it would be so it was definitely thrilling even though it had no loops.

I'm glad that we chose it for our first coaster together and that we'll go on so many more together.  It just goes to show that not everything needs to be planned, you can check off your bucket list even if it's not a planned production.

Seize the moment and have an adventure whenever the opportunity arises!

Check out our other Bucket List Goals!

Miami PhotoShoot

This is the last of the Miami blogs and photos...  I want to be back on vacation again but I guess it'll have to wait a bit...

I never know how to pose

 

Hubby

Looking into the sunrise

rising over the rocks

Birds Flying high

Climbing the rocks 

Panorama photo

Loveeee

See you another time Miami!!!

Miami Adventures Part III and Restaurant Review: Katsuya

Sunrise from our hotel room

On the Saturday of our mini moon, we decided to take it easy. Originally we were going to wake up early for the sunrise... but we kind of failed. We woke up briefly and I took some pictures from the window and I went right back to sleep. Our walk to the beach had to wait till the following day.
Eventually, we woke up and made our way to my friend Priscilla’s house. I’ve known her since pre-k, maybe even longer than that since our grandparents made friends in the playground years ago.  After high school, she and her whole family moved to Miami so I haven’t been able to see her all that much. In fact I haven’t seen her since her wedding 3 years ago. And she couldn’t make it to our wedding since she has 16 month old twins running around.

It was so nice going to catch up with them.  We had breakfast with her, her mother Paz, her husband Sal and her mother-in-law and the babies.  It was a super relaxing morning filled with reminiscing and laughter. I’m so glad Baros got to meet them for the first time and that we could spend that little bit of time hanging out with them.   

Waiting for our dinner

Afterwards, we went back to the hotel and had a bite to eat at the hotel bar before heading out to the beach.  We spent the entire afternoon on the beach, in the water sans technology. We went disconnected for the entire afternoon and it felt so good.   No pictures, no internet, just the beach and waves.

Eventually we made our way to our last dinner in Miami. We dressed up nicely and were so excited to head over to Katsuya. It was in a beautiful fancy hotel with vaulted ceilings and mood music.  It was lovely to look at. Our hostesses were incredible and our waitress friendly if slow.

I was especially excited about going to Katsuya because it was a sushi restaurant with a twist.  And there was also Wagyu Beef and various other exciting elements to try on the menu. It’s definitely on the pricey side but we decided we would splurge for our last meal in Miami.  

Our delicious Chardonnay

Was it worth it?

Kind of.
The bottle of wine we ordered was delicious. So good, in fact, that we googled the bottle and the price had been gauged considerably.  The good news is we can afford it normally and it is a beautiful chardonnay. The bad news is that it was up-charged a good deal, which screams ridiculous to me.

Our Sushi Roll

Every food item we ordered was on the chef’s specialty list. We assumed it would be the best on the menu.

The sushi roll we got was a chef specialty called the Special Katsuya Roll which had Tuna, Yellowtail, salmon, scallop, crab and avocado wrapped with rice, soy paper and cucumber but there wasn’t as much fish in it as I would have liked.  It was good but I wanted more. Also, I wasn't super keen on the wrapping. The soy was pretty tasteless (which was fine and normal) but there was a lot of cucumber. I wound up eating it separately since it overwhelmed the little fish that was in the roll.

We got the Lobster Dynamite and it was delicious. It was a half lobster sautéed with mushroom tossed in creamy dynamite sauce and baked. It was creamy and melted in our mouths, so I was happy with it. However, the lobster in our Lobster Roll from the day before was more plentiful and equally delicious for less.

Wagyu Ribeye

The Wagyu Ribeye was the real winner of the evening.  It was 10oz of Wagyu ribeye served with

Look at that deliciousness

maitake mushrooms and a truffle butter on the side. It was absolutely delicious and the favorite dish we ate there. Wagyu is a specialty beef known for its texture and flavor and we were not disappointed.  It was expensive but worth it. We could have happily eaten two servings.

Overall, our meal was good but not as special as the price tag would have you believe.  

My chocolate deliciousness

The only other thing I can really complain about is the service.  Our waitress was friendly but it took us asking on 3 different occasions to get our bill.  We waited over a half hour and the hostess had to grab our waitress for us. We had almost been about to order dessert but we didn’t want to wait any longer.

Oh well, it was still a good meal.  

Walking back to the hotel

After that, we grabbed some delicious Häagen-Dazs and walked back to our hotel.  We called it an early night so we could get up at sunrise the next morning and take photos and swim.

part of our walk

the funniest sign

Sunrise

Our last morning in Miami was incredible.  We woke up at 6:20ish (for me, with great difficulty since I am the world’s worst morning person) and walked down to the beach.  We got to enjoy a beautiful sunrise and the peace of the ocean sounds before the beach became crowded with crowds of sun worshipping beach goers.  We had an impromptu photo shoot and just took in the beauty of a near empty beach.

When we were done with our photographic relaxing adventure, we had breakfast and went to the pool for one last swim before getting on our plane back to Jersey.


Read Part I and Part II of our adventures also!